“I am okay as long as the people around me are okay too. The world would be a better place if people could treat each other with respect. I must keep the peace; I must be tolerant and accepting; Can’t everyone just get along? ”
Oh, why can’t we all just get along? Harmony hey.
In the Entrepreneurs Organization, Trust and Respect is a foundational value in the way we treat each other. Shoshin – a beginner's mindset – foundationally requires that everyone is treated with respect, so I definitely subscribe to this value set.
I’m not too sure about keeping the peace. As a 7, I’m ok even if everyone around me isn’t. For a 9, this is impossible. They will strive to adapt, they will avoid conflict like the plague, and if they are in conflict, it will often show up passively.
You can imagine how this would drive a competitive achiever or an active controller nuts. They just want to get things done, and a 9 would tell them what they want to hear and then deal with the consequences later. Recipe for a blow-up.
These folks are great at handling complex problems, processing large amounts of data and adapting to the environment. Amicable and easy to get along with, you might think you are best buds with a 9, while deeper down they really don’t like how this is going.
The adaptability might also be construed as not being authentic. This is the farthest thing from the truth, the 9 is just very good at subordinating their own needs to the needs of the collective. But it can be cause for judgement and frustration from others.
The work, for the 9, is to put their needs ahead of others. This is a space of huge discomfort – but then, again, that’s what the Enneagram is all about…